Aug 4th 2025, 15:45:51
Dear fellow empires, raiders, bottomfeeders, and netting savants,
As I sit atop my marble throne in the Ministry of Clicking “Explore” and Praying to the Market Gods, I feel obligated to share with you plebeians the sacred art of Republicing™ — an advanced economic doctrine passed down through generations of greedy technocrats and caffeine-fueled spreadsheet wizards.
I’m not here to win wars. I’m not here to send missiles. I’m here to grind money, tech, and the last remnants of my sanity for my glorious clan overlords. I have embraced the zen of 0 missiles, 0 jets, 0 tanks, and approximately 14 million bushels of food that I undercut you on by $1 every day.
You built troops?
Cute.
I built NASDAQ 2077 and then tech jumped into the stratosphere while sipping oil like it's a mimosa.
You wasted your turns suiciding into some random top 20 guy?
Cool story bro.
I spent mine getting 800 BPT while watching reruns of The West Wing and pricing tech like a Monopoly landlord on payday.
My networth is not a number. It's a statement.
My military is a smokescreen made of fresh tears from LandTraders.
My defense? Market manipulation, baby. You try to spy me? Joke’s on you, my spies are actually unionized interns who work from home.
Oh, and for those of you running Dictatorships thinking you're “efficient”? That’s adorable. Maybe next set you’ll upgrade to a real government and stop putting tanks in your pantry.
Anyway, back to funding the clan’s war chest while you all argue about optimal tank-to-jet ratios like it's 2012.
Peace through profits,
— Supreme Technocrat of Republic #137, proudly stuffing tech into the vaults since Turn 1
P.S. If you market snipe me again, I will start buying food at max price just to spite you. Don't test me.
As I sit atop my marble throne in the Ministry of Clicking “Explore” and Praying to the Market Gods, I feel obligated to share with you plebeians the sacred art of Republicing™ — an advanced economic doctrine passed down through generations of greedy technocrats and caffeine-fueled spreadsheet wizards.
I’m not here to win wars. I’m not here to send missiles. I’m here to grind money, tech, and the last remnants of my sanity for my glorious clan overlords. I have embraced the zen of 0 missiles, 0 jets, 0 tanks, and approximately 14 million bushels of food that I undercut you on by $1 every day.
You built troops?
Cute.
I built NASDAQ 2077 and then tech jumped into the stratosphere while sipping oil like it's a mimosa.
You wasted your turns suiciding into some random top 20 guy?
Cool story bro.
I spent mine getting 800 BPT while watching reruns of The West Wing and pricing tech like a Monopoly landlord on payday.
My networth is not a number. It's a statement.
My military is a smokescreen made of fresh tears from LandTraders.
My defense? Market manipulation, baby. You try to spy me? Joke’s on you, my spies are actually unionized interns who work from home.
Oh, and for those of you running Dictatorships thinking you're “efficient”? That’s adorable. Maybe next set you’ll upgrade to a real government and stop putting tanks in your pantry.
Anyway, back to funding the clan’s war chest while you all argue about optimal tank-to-jet ratios like it's 2012.
Peace through profits,
— Supreme Technocrat of Republic #137, proudly stuffing tech into the vaults since Turn 1
P.S. If you market snipe me again, I will start buying food at max price just to spite you. Don't test me.